Review of the movie "Lion"

Sheila and I watched a movie Friday night that she had been wanting to see.  It is based on the true story of Sharoo Brierly.  He was from a small village in India, where he lived with his mother, older brother and baby sister.  His family was very poor...his mother worked in a rock quarry, and he and his brothers scrounged (and stole) whatever they could to survive.  At the age of 5, he was separated from his family by tragic circumstances and ended up over 900 miles away in the city of Calcutta...lost and alone.  The movie portrays the horrors of what happens to children living on the streets in India...and in their "orphanages".  (I HOPE that things have changed greatly since the 80's, when this story took place!) 

Sharoo was adopted by an Australian couple, who later adopted another boy from India.  Their early years are quickly skimmed over, and the story resumes when Sharoo is in his mid-20's, when he decides to try to find his birth family.  The obstacles he faces are monumental, considering India had a population of around 1.2 BILLION people at the time of his search (and over 500,000 villages)! 

I don't want to spoil the movie for anyone who decides to watch it, so I won't go into any more details of the story.  What I will do is talk about how powerful this movie is!  Of course, I am especially vulnerable to adoption stories right now...with one adopted grandson from Ethiopia and another one in process from Vietnam.  I can get pretty emotional!  This story had me bawling out loud.  I was trying so hard to hold it in (because it really embarrasses me to sob uncontrollably in front of other people!), but I couldn't.  My heart broke for this little boy as he faced the unbelievable challenges of being alone and abused and finally flying to another country to live with strangers that he couldn't understand.  Thankfully (at least, hopefully) neither of my grandsons have had to face the abuses that Sharoo did, but the emotional impact of international adoption on a child is still very traumatic.  I already knew this in my head, but seeing it portrayed brought it home to my heart.  (I wasn't around Shepherd very much when he first came home...certainly not on a daily basis.)  Even though I strongly believe in adoption (whether domestic or international), I also recognize the struggles that children face when such a traumatic upheaval occurs in their lives.  I've observed it, not only watching Stephen and Mandy as they brought Shepherd home; but also seeing how my CASA kiddos have struggled through the whole foster care and adoption process.  The older the child, the more traumatic it is, because they remember their birth families and love them and want to go back to them.  But even in infants, their little brains retain their birth mothers' smell and the sound of her voice and they suffer from being separated from her.  Even when they come from terrible homes, their brains are still hardwired with the memories of being separated from their familiar people and they suffer trauma.

Sheila has done a lot more research on this subject than I have, but I have read books and articles about what happens to the brains of children when they suffer early trauma.  The effects can be extreme and permanent.  Being loved and cared for by insightful and understanding parents can make a world of difference, but some still end up permanently "damaged".  Some of this was process was demonstrated in this movie, and it was so very painful to watch!  I'm extremely thankful that Shepherd has done so well in his adjustment and attachment to Stephen and Mandy (and Jesse!), as well as to the extended family.  I hope and pray that Josiah will be resilient and do well with his transition when the time comes.  I certainly will have a little better understanding of what he will be going through and hopefully react in a way that will help him.  Sheila is constantly studying about the challenges that he and she may face...throughout his life.  I'm sure if anyone can do a good job of seeing a child through this traumatic time, she can! 

In conclusion, I would like to recommend this movie to all...not just to those who are interested in adoption.  It does such a good job of showing what these little ones go through and how their past can influence them throughout their lives.  It also demonstrates the love that (good) adoptive parents have for these "chosen" children.  I think we should all open our minds and hearts to those who are the most in need.  Not everyone can adopt.  Not everyone will choose to assist those who do adopt.  But I think we should all be willing to learn more about adoption and be more compassionate and understanding with those who do feel called to reach out to these precious children.  We are commanded to minister to widows and orphans.  Being supportive of those who decide to open their homes and hearts to orphans or abandoned or abused children is the least that anyone can do!  (A neat side note of interest...Nicole Kidman, who plays Sharoo's mother in the movie has adopted two children in real life.) 

Be sure to have tissues handy!

Learning to cook Vietnamese

The tile is finished!  (Well, except for sealing the grout and doing the final cleaning…waiting on a special product for that.)  It was one really tough job, but I love how it looks!  Dennis is looking forward to getting back to working with wood next week. (Pictures to come later.) 

I had an interesting adventure on Thursday.  I went to NRH to sign a release for Daddy’s medical records.  So I decided to use my time in FW to find an Asian market to buy some things for cooking a Vietnamese meal.  (There are several ingredients that you just can’t get anywhere else.)  There was a Vietnamese supermarket not too far from the doctor’s office that I decided to try out.  I had read the reviews that said it was great for produce, and the prices were very reasonable.  They did have a good selection of fresh herbs, but you’d better know what you needed looked like (and/or smelled like), because most of it wasn’t labeled!  I found all of the spices I needed except for one, which I just decided to leave out.  The store inventory wasn’t well organized, and things weren’t labeled well, and some items were not in English.  It was kind of like being on a scavenger hunt.  The prices were amazing though!  I found a good brand of Vietnamese fish sauce, which is a staple in their cooking, for less than $2 for a 15 oz. bottle.  I had read that the kind from Vietnam, which is supposed to be the best, was expensive.  I was very pleasantly surprised!

Sheila was supposed to go to Arkansas this weekend, but developed a kidney infection and decided to stay home.  So she came over and spent last night and helped me cook all day today.  We fixed chicken pho (soup), which is pretty much an all-day affair.  I washed all of the produce this morning and picked through my (home grown) bean sprouts.  We also mixed together our dipping sauce, to allow the flavors to mingle all day.  Then, after lunch, we started cooking the pho.  While I started poaching the chicken, Sheila pan roasted the spices and onions, shallots and leeks.  It smelled WONDERFUL!  The chicken only cooked for about 45 minutes, then was boned out.  The meat was set aside for adding at the end, while the bones and skin was adding back to the broth…along with the roasted onion mixture.  After another hour, the spices were added and cooked for an hour.  Next came the rock sugar, and 30 more minutes of cooking.  Finally the broth was strained.  During all of this cooking time, the garnishes were chopped and prepared, plus we put together the fresh spring rolls (not fried!).  Finally the rice noodles were soaked, and the chicken and fish sauce were added to the broth for a few more minutes of cooking.  At serving time, everything was then layered into bowls…topped with bean sprouts, fresh mint, Thai basil and cilantro, fresh sliced jalapenos, and fresh and fried sliced green onions.  Delicious!  Dennis wasn’t a fan (at all!), but Sheila and I enjoyed it!  We decided it is just for special occasions though.  Much easier to get it at a Vietnamese restaurant!  It was a little cheaper making it ourselves, but not by much.  It was a fun way to spend a Saturday with my girl!

I was WAY overly optimistic!

We DID get the tile all laid last week.  I just didn't realize what all had to happen before we finished the job!  That mortar stuff that you stick the tiles down with (Kwik Set) has to completely dry, THEN you have to go back and clean it out between the tile.  That is a back breaker (and knee, and shoulder) job that takes forever!!!  We've finished the entryway and laundry room and pantries (except for sealing the grout).  We are close to finishing the dining room...hope to get it cleaned and grouted tomorrow.  Then we still have the kitchen.  It is taking us at least a whole day to do one room.  If we were younger, it might go faster, but we don't have the stamina that we once had!  At least my kitchen is functional again.  I'm enjoying having my stove and ice maker and washer and dryer all working again!

Dennis got the doors hung on my pantry and storage closet Saturday.  That sure helps the aesthetics a lot!  (Plus it cuts down on construction dust settling on everything!)  After we finish with the tile, he'll start working on trim.  THAT will be very exciting!  I can't wait to see what the finished project will look like!

the entryway

dining room (in progress)

pantry and storage closet doors (they will be painted white)

Daddy and Bobbie did well on their trip over the weekend, even though it wore them out!  We are currently dealing with the issue of Daddy's driver's license, which isn't going well.  That is one hard hurdle to address!  He is being required to take a driving test, as well as have a letter from his doctor stating that he is ok to drive.  His doctor refused to supply it, so he wants to shop for a new doctor.  He will have 30 days to comply with the DPS, or they will revoke his license.  We've tried to reason with him that it is just time to give it up, but he isn't ready to believe that.  Prayers for all of us are greatly appreciated!

I tell you what, all of this with Daddy has me doing a LOT of thinking about my aging and wanting to make it an easier transition for my kids to deal with.  I started writing out my instructions for my final arrangements this morning.  (Sheila, you will find them in my personal and confidential folder on my computer.)  My main desire is for my kids to do what is best for them, when the time comes.  I won't be there, so I really don't care what they do!  I have made a few suggestions, though, in case they are interested.  😉  After we finish with all that we are doing on the house and with Daddy's stuff, we really need to find a lawyer and make out a will.  We've talked about it for years, but just have never taken the time to do it.  I also plan to continue to sort through "stuff" and clean things out as much as I can...so they won't have to later.  I know people "my age" don't like to admit that we are getting old, but pushing 60 ain't no spring chicken!  I certainly feel the effects of age and realize that my time is limited.  God willing, I hope to have another 20 years or so to enjoy watching my grandkids grow up and enjoy time with Dennis in our retirement.  Whether I do or not, I really want to be proactive and have things lined up for my kiddos. 

We have the estate sale set for May 5 and 6, from 8 to 5.  The planners have been working on the house the past couple of Sundays and plan to start fulltime next Monday.  It is a BIG job!  The house will go on the market on May 8.  I'm hoping that we already have several offers to choose from when it does.  The realtor will start "advertising" 10 days before open house.  We've already had interest shown from a couple of people.  I'm hoping we can have the house sold by sometime in June.

I am trying an experiment.  I love fresh bean sprouts in Vietnamese food!  Sheila suggested I try growing my own.  So I am giving it a try!  I'm hoping to make pho and fresh spring rolls for supper Friday night, and they SHOULD be ready by then.  I hope they turn out good!

Well, that's all for now.  I hope things are going well where you are. 

Settling into a routine

The guys have been putting down floor tile for the past week.  It has turned out to be a lot more work than any of us anticipated!  It is going well…just very time consuming.  It has to cure for a couple of days before walking on it, so the placement has been very strategical.  The dining room is (as of today) done, as is half of the entryway and most of the kitchen.  I expect everything to be laid by the end of today, except for the laundry room and pantries.  I’m hoping that we’ll be able to move all of my kitchen appliances back in on Wednesday, so I can start cooking again.  It will probably be the end of the week before I can do laundry here again.  Thankfully, we have a laundromat just around the corner.  My dryer is still hooked up, so all I’ve had to do is wash at the laundromat and then bring everything back home to dry.

After all of the tile is laid, we’ll still have to grout it and seal the grout.  It should all be finished by this weekend.  I’ll post pictures once it is all finished out and looking good.  Right now there are still spacers between tiles and gaps where the grout will go.  I’m really happy with how it is looking though!

Bobbie’s surgery went well last week, and she hasn’t had much pain since the day after surgery.  The doctor said her bones are very soft, so we are hoping that it holds this time.  Rather than using screws, he just wired it all together really well.  We have tried to emphasize to both her and Daddy that they really need to be careful, so she doesn’t fall anymore.  She is too fragile to take chances!

The girls had an estate sale at Spur over the weekend.  Toni said they didn’t sell anywhere near all they wanted, but they still did well.  Our estate sale planner has already started working at the Saginaw house.  It is so nice to see things moving along!

The folks will be gone for 5 days this coming weekend.  Toni and Kathy are driving them to Abilene for the Young family reunion.  They are really looking forward to it!  Afterwards, they’ll drive them up to Spur for a couple of days.  It has been about 4 months since the folks have been to Spur!  That is the longest they have EVER gone!

Everything else seems to be going along pretty smoothly.  It is great to finally have things start to settle into a “normal” routine.  I’ve gotten to where I make a couple of trips to Weatherford a week and have most of Daddy’s business taken care of…or in the process of being taken care of. (I still have some medical records that I need to access in order to file a claim on Daddy’s cancer policy.  I’ll have to make a trip over to NRH to get that taken care of.)  The folks come to Highway on Sunday mornings and eat lunch with us.  Yesterday the house was too treacherous for them to come over, so we took them out for catfish.  Then they went to visit my Aunt Coez.  They go to Eastside for the afternoon services. 

I’m thankful that my CASA cases have been pretty quiet lately!  I finally got the final orders for one of my cases (that I’ve been on for 2 years).  So all we have left to do is have the final hearing for them to be ok’d by the judge.  That will just leave me with one case.  I won’t be taking on any more until after Josiah comes home and we get him settled (and get used to OUR new routine with him).  Still haven’t heard anything on that front.  Hoping and praying for Sheila to hear something SOON!

Have a great week!

Setbacks and Progress

Well, I really think things are starting to come together for Daddy and Bobbie.  Of course, most of you know that Bobbie is going to have to have her elbow surgery redone.  That was a big disappointment!  Her bones just aren’t what they once were, so the screw didn’t hold.  This time the doctor will use a longer screw and wire it to secure it.  Hopefully her recovery will go smoothly!

I think we’ve finally got Daddy’s prescription mail order service working smoothly.  That is SUCH a relief!  I’m not sure if Bobbie’s is lined out completely, yet, or not.  They were still having some issues the last I heard, but they should have things smoothed out soon, if they don’t already.  I love being able to check on the status of his prescription deliveries from my computer!  The office manager at Brookdale is pretty happy about it, too!  We’ve gotten to be pretty chummy over the past few weeks.

I believe we’ve found a good estate sale planner!  I met with two last Tuesday, but I pretty much already had my mind made up before meeting with them.  One lady had been so helpful and informative in her correspondence with me.  She had provided references, which I called, and they raved about the service she provided!  When we finally met, I knew she was the one I wanted to handle the sale.  She is very professional, very knowledgeable, very compassionate, and a hoot to boot!  She plans to start working on getting things ready around the end of April, and the sale should be early in May.  We signed a contract, so the house is now off-limits to Daddy and Bobbie…no more sneaking over there and finding more stuff to keep!  This ought to keep them home more, too.  They were constantly running back over to Saginaw for one reason or another!

I think they are starting to settle in and enjoy their new home now.  Daddy’s been working out in the garden some.  They had some kids come last week and plant flowers.  Daddy seemed to really enjoy that!  They also have another couple that they seem to really enjoy visiting with.  Daddy is determined, now, to try to talk Mayrene into moving to Brookdale!  He thinks it would be perfect for her!  LOL!

Before we could close Daddy’s bank account in Saginaw, we had to find out what a certain monthly ACH withdrawal was (he couldn’t remember).  I got the name and contact info last week and called.  It turned out to be an insurance company that he had purchased a cancer policy from back in ’02.  He then forgot he had it.  So I cancelled the policy and explained that he had been diagnosed with prostate cancer in ’08.  They said they would send me a claims packet, so that we could file on it.  So if I can get Daddy to remember who his doctor was, he can recover some of his expenses from his treatments. 

I started feeling much better this past week and was finally able to get in a couple of CASA visits before the month ran out!  I was cutting it pretty close!  It is so nice to be about over that crud I had.  I’m still coughing a little, but not bad at all.  Still having quite a bit of drainage, but that may just be from allergies. 

Dennis’ fall on Friday sure scared me and Ricky.  I was in the house, and Dennis decided to go ahead and do some painting on the garage before Ricky arrived.  All of a sudden I heard a crash and thud and then a loud growl.  I was out the door as quickly as I could go and found the ladder lying on one side of the driveway and Dennis on the other.  He was holding the back of his head and blood was all over his hand.  He managed to get up and come in the house, and Ricky showed up about that time.  Dennis was in a LOT of pain and dizzy and nauseated.  His vision was blurry, too.  I was sure convinced that he had a concussion.  I tried to clean up his head, so we could see how bad it looked.  There was so much blood, I couldn’t really tell anything.  I tried to get him to let us help him to the car to go to the ER, but he was too dizzy to get up.  We waited until he finally felt like he could walk on his own, and I drove him to the hospital, with Ricky right behind us.  They took him right in and processed him as soon as he walked in.  We saw a doctor within 5 minutes of arriving!  His dizziness and blurred vision had already cleared up by that time, and his pupils were reactive, so the doctor just stapled his head gash shut and sent him home.  His headache went away quickly, without taking anything for it!  I was amazed at how quickly he got over it.  He set up a chair on the front lawn to “supervise” Ricky finishing up the new gable over the garage.  Next thing I knew, he was back up on the ladder helping him!  *shakes head wearily*  Today has been his worst day since the initial fall.  His muscles all over are sore!  He never did have any more headaches though.  His right elbow is very tender to the touch.  His bottom and elbow took the brunt of the impact.  He came out of it pretty well, considering!  I’m hoping he will wait to do ladder work until someone is out there with him from now on! 

The girls, Diane B and I went to watch Beauty and the Beast yesterday afternoon.  We loved it!  The girls were both skeptical about it, since they both LOVED the animated version from their childhoods.  But we were all impressed with the good job they did on this one.  I especially liked the backstory…filling in some of the blanks.  After the movie, we went to eat at a new Vietnamese restaurant that the girls had discovered.  As much as I love pho, I decided to try something different this time.  I really enjoy trying out new things, and I’m glad I did.  I ordered a vermicelli dish that was delicious!  It was very simple, but extremely flavorful.  (The egg rolls were delish, too!) 

The guys had a “between services” business meeting this afternoon, so Daddy, Bobbie and I came home and ate leftovers.  I had cooked a chicken and rice enchilada casserole Friday night, expecting Sheila to come over.  She was feeling poorly from a cold and decided to stay home.  The recipe makes a LOT, so I took some over to her yesterday, and we ate off of some more of it today.  There is STILL enough for Dennis and I to have another generous meal.  The folks and I had a good visit, and then they left to visit my mom’s cousin, Vera, before heading to Eastside for afternoon services.

Dennis hopes to start laying floor tile this week!  I am really excited to get that done!  Thiess is supposed to come over to help him get started, since Dennis has never worked with floor tile before.  I think it will go pretty fast once they get the hang of it. 

I’ve got a couple of CASA commitments this week, plus I’m supposed to meet with Teddy to sign the contract for listing Daddy’s house…plus Bobbie’s surgery is Wednesday.  I’m hoping for a pretty calm and productive week!