Is Suicide a Selfish Act, or Not?

Let me begin by saying that I don’t usually like to get involved in “disagreements” on social media.  I see them as negative and a waste of time.  However, I read an article today that someone had posted; and I disagree so strongly and feel like the title is so harmful, that I am compelled to sound off on the subject.  My intent is not to hurt anyone!  I realize that others may strongly disagree with my opinion.  I've put a lot of thought into whether I should post this or not, and my conscience will not allow me to remain silent.

The name of the article was “There’s Nothing Selfish about Suicide”.  It was written by a child and adolescent psychotherapist, so it must be true…right?  (That could get me started on a whole ‘nother subject…that of believing everything we read!)

Is suicide a selfish act or not?  The dictionary defines the word “selfish” as being chiefly concerned with one's own interest, advantage, etc, especially to the total exclusion of the interests of others; relating to or characterized by self-interest.  I agree that being suicidal is a symptom of deep depression.  As the writer of the article states, “Suicide is a decision made out of desperation, hopelessness, isolation and loneliness. The black hole that is clinical depression is all-consuming. Feeling like a burden to loved ones, feeling like there is no way out, feeling trapped and feeling isolated are all common among people who suffer from depression.”

However, having witnessed the aftermath of suicide (which the author describes very well), I can’t agree with her conclusions.  I’m very concerned about the “non-judgmental” society in which we live and the consequences of people not believing that they are accountable for their actions.  I’m not getting into the debate over what is the “eternal outcome” of one who kills themselves.  I believe God is the ONLY one who can make that determination.  I’m talking about what happens here…in this life.  I’ve watched attitudes about suicide go from being the “unpardonable sin” to being the supreme act of selfLESSness.  You know what else I’ve seen?  The suicide rate has dramatically risen over the past decade…by nearly 30 percent!

I have watched what happens to the family of those who commit suicide…seeing the unimaginable pain and guilt and horror faced by the ones who are left behind.  I know someone who has been suicidal that has also watched this process.  They have made the statement that NOT wanting to inflict that on their loved ones has, at times, been the only thing that kept them from going through with the act.  If society completely removes the “stigma” from suicide and makes it an acceptable way to deal with pain and depression, then I believe we will continue to see the rates climb. 

Let me say that I am very compassionate towards those who suffer from clinical depression.  My heart breaks for someone who feels (USUALLY erroneously) that they have nothing left to live for.  My heart also breaks for family members who have to continue to live with the pain and guilt and suffering that occurs when a loved one kills themselves.  I am not a psychologist or psychiatrist or therapist.  I don’t know how to bring someone out of that black hole of depression.  However, I do know that depression is always focused inward.  When a person wants to end their life, it is because THEY no longer want to, or feel like they CAN, live with their pain.  If they can look outside of themselves long enough to see what they would be doing to others, I truly believe that they could be motivated to find another way to deal with their depression.  So yes, I do believe that suicide is a selfish decision.  I believe that proposing anything different is just giving permission to those who are struggling with those thoughts to feel justified in acting on them.  The article stated that believing suicide is a selfish act will only hurt others.  I believe it may save their lives.