I spoke too soon!

Just as soon as I wrote that Dad was doing some better, things took a downward turn. Friday, he was very confused. I’m thankful that Dennis was with me that day, as we had a big mess to clean up. We had to completely change all of his clothes and bedding. He had his pants on wrong-side out, and his “briefs” on the outside of his pants. The simplest of actions are getting to be more than he can manage. Then tonight, he was really bad. I don’t know when I’ve seen him so weak. Usually he tries to get up by himself, and either can do it or manage with a little help. Tonight, he wouldn’t even sit forward. We had to help him sit up straight and then lift him to a standing position. When he then tried to walk, he was barely able to do so. I don’t know what’s going on, but he really went downhill fast! The nurse wasn’t at the nurses’ station, so I wasn’t able to talk to her about him, but I plan to go in the morning and try to find out if they’ve noticed him being that poorly when I’m not there. I don’t know if he was just worn out at the end of the day, or if he’d been that way all day. Maybe it was just a bad day.

We got the last of Ricky and Amber’s stuff moved yesterday, with Layne’s help. I think they are really going to love their new place. Copper didn’t like the move itself, but he seemed to settle in once they got him there. He immediately went to the shed and made him a nice little bed. It will be a great place where he can get out of the weather! I can’t wait to see everything after Amber has had time to get everything organized and put up. She had their duplex looking so cute! I can only imagine what she’ll do with this house. She is really good at decorating!

We enjoyed our monthly potluck and guest speaker today. Koh was our speaker. It was a treat to visit with him and his lovely family! Mel and Cindy showed up, too. What a nice surprise! The Fields’ hosted the dinner this month (although Heather wasn’t able to get out of bed). Maddi filled in nicely as the hostess. I think everyone had a great time…I know I did. Then we had our “singing service” and Kyler gave a short lesson. What a great day!

We are meeting Sheila, Matt and Nam tomorrow for lunch. Then Dennis and I are going to entertain Nam, while his folks take care of some business. It has been three weeks since we’ve seen them, so we are really looking forward to it! I really miss that kid! Dennis and I are both excited about having him for the whole week of spring break. We are hoping to do a little camping at the state park. We’ve been wanting to take him ever since he got here, but the opportunity just never presented itself. I sure hope the weather cooperates!

Today is the fourth anniversary of Shepherd’s adoption! In some ways, it is hard to believe we’ve had him that long. In other ways, it feels like we’ve always had him. He has been such a blessing to our family! He is sweet and loving and funny and a very handsome little guy! I can’t imagine our lives without him!

Well, I hope this week treats you all well. Take care!

Prayer request and general update

I have a lot on my heart right now. The past couple of weeks have been a real roller-coaster ride. My emotions are kind of “all over the place”.

Of course, having the family together for Thanksgiving was great! Before they all arrived, though, Ricky discovered a lump in his neck. Since the doctor’s offices were all closed for the holiday, he couldn’t get in to see his regular doctor until Monday. She immediately set him up for a CT scan. Then she got him a referral to see a specialist this morning. (It is hard to believe how fast this has all happened! It seemed to take forever while it was going on.) The specialist said it is definitely a tumor, but a biopsy will have to be done to determine whether it is cancer or not. There is only a 10% chance of it being malignant. If it is benign, they will remove the tumor and part of the thyroid. If it is malignant, the whole thyroid will have to be removed and surrounding lymph nodes checked to see if it has spread. They also discovered inflammation in his esophagus which is causing him to have some trouble swallowing, which they think is related to reflux. They have scheduled a swallow test to check on that on the 14^th. Hopefully the biopsy will be scheduled before that. Then he will go back to see the specialist on the 18^th to find out all of the results and schedule his surgery. So it is going to be a rough couple of weeks. Prayers are much appreciated!

We had our monthly potluck at the Fields’ house last Sunday. Poor Heather was too ill to get out of bed, so Layne and the kids took care of hosting everyone. All of the Pettit bunch were up (David was our guest speaker), so it was great to have the extra time to visit with them. David did a wonderful job on his lesson, as always. I do enjoy listening to that young man! The folks were doing well and were able to enjoy the whole day out, too.

I took Daddy to see his general practitioner on Wednesday. We won’t be able to get his bloodwork done until next week, but his A1C was fine. No changes in medication were needed this time, which was great! He goes back to see his podiatrist next week, then his pain management (for follow-up from his procedure) and hearing specialist the following week. He is pretty much holding his own for now. Bobbie has been doing better lately. She was diagnosed with some kind of auto-immune disorder that was causing a rash all over…especially on her face, neck and chest. They put her on a prednisone pack and the rash has greatly improved. Her appetite has been good lately and she is getting around about as good as she ever does anymore.

Nam is enjoying being 5 years old. He thinks he is such a big boy now! He and his momma are on their way to San Antonio for the weekend, along with a few others from the HC young parent group. He was a little nervous, but excited, about the trip; but he did tell me that he would miss me! (I love that kid!) So Dennis and I ended up with the day off today (which has been super helpful with all of Ricky’s stuff!), as well as Monday.

Since we didn’t have to get up early today, we decided to go on another date last night. We ate at El Fenix and then tried out the Film Alley in Weatherford for the first time. We watched “Instant Family”, which I have been wanting to see since the first trailers came out. I love anything that has to do with fostering or adoption, and this movie was about both. It is based on a true story and really plucks your heartstrings! I told Dennis after it was over that I was really glad that they made it into a comedy! I cried enough as it was! But it had some REALLY funny scenes in it, too…some that I could relate to! There was quite a bit of bad and crude language in it, but that is to be expected for the circumstances of the film. These kids come from some rough backgrounds! Some of the language was just gratuitous, which is common in movies today. I wouldn’t recommend it for kids for that reason. But it really does a good job of showing the need for good foster/adoptive parents and the struggles that they and the children face.

Dennis is scheduled to speak at Hurst this coming Lord’s Day. We are looking forward to visiting with the folks over there. It will do Daddy and Bobbie good to go, too.

There are so many in need of prayers right now:  those who lost loved ones this past week; Sherrill C, who is recovering from meningitis; Nancy, who is still struggling with her cancer and waiting to be matched with a clinical trial; and so many others. Please remember Ricky along with the rest. Hoping for a little less “eventful” week next week!

Day 6 - I am thankful for adoption

A year ago today, Sheila, Jessica and I embarked on the trip of a lifetime. Not only was it the first time I’d ever been to a foreign country, but it brought our sweet Nam into our family. I remember feeling terrified: to be flying so far, to be spending 2-3 weeks in an Asian (communist) country, and to be helping care for a scared little orphan boy. As is true most of the time, most of my fears were unfounded. I did fine flying (although spending that much time on a plane is NOT pleasant). We didn’t have any REAL trouble in Vietnam (just a few glitches here and there that were able to be dealt with). And Nam was NOT the scared little orphan boy that I expected. Sure he was nervous at times, but that kid was SO brave and adventuresome, and hungry for love and family! We had some pretty rough moments (or hours), but all in all that kid was amazing in his resiliency.

Here we are a year later. Nam is fully integrated into our family. He speaks fluent English and has an impressive vocabulary (for any almost 5-year-old). He is happy and well-adjusted (for the most part). He can be sweet and affectionate (or not). He’s really just a pretty typical little boy! He has a love for life that is infectious. His favorite animals are the big African and Asian cats, crocodiles, rhinos, etc. (the common theme being that they are dangerous). Right now his occupations of choice (for when he grows up) are fireman, policeman, ambulance driver, “taking care of dangerous animals”, garbage man or ice cream truck driver. Ha! He wants to travel extensively when he grows up: to Asia, Africa, South America, and “where he can see polar bears, brown bears and black bears”. He also wants to own a farm that raises all sorts of unusual critters: all types of deer, skunks, geese, flamingos, for starters. (Of course the skunks would have to be de-scented first.)

It has been fun to watch the changes as Nam has learned about family and security and compassion and kindness and love. Seeing him learn about God and being a part of a church family has really been heart-warming. He is smart and has picked up so much already. He knows a LOT of Bible stories and can name some characters that would surprise you. He knows the words to a lot of songs…his favorite being “Oh Thou Fount of Every Blessing.” At our recent meeting, Ken got up Saturday morning and said something about God being holy. I could hear a sweet little husky voice in the back of the building start singing, “Holy, Holy, Holy”! When I was talking to Sheila about it later, she said she tried to shush him, and he countered with “but I was singing!” I got a kick out it myself! He has now been through a meeting with over 100 people in attendance and did just fine. Another hurdle overcome!

I love being able to have a grandkid around whenever I want. I still miss Jesse, Shepherd and Gracie and would love to spend more time with them. But having Nam close by really helps. I especially love it when we all get together and I can see all of the littles playing together! I am REALLY looking forward to Thanksgiving. Since Nam’s birthday is that same week, we will also have his party while the cousins are in town. He is very excited about his birthday. He’s been talking about it all year. Now that it is November, he can hardly wait! He is really looking forward to being five!

He had his second sleepover with us Friday night (without Mom). He did great, again. He did miss Sheila and told her later that next time he wants her to come, too. But we had fun! We cooked hamburgers and rode bikes at the state park. After supper, we watched a movie (Mulan) and ate popcorn. Dennis got up early Saturday morning and went hunting. Nam “slept in” until 6:15 (Granny was hoping for a little later get-up time), then we had our favorite bacon and pancakes for breakfast. About the time we were needing to leave to meet up with Sheila, we got a call from Grandad saying he had killed a deer. So we met up with him at the rest stop on 180, so Nam could see the deer. On the way, he was telling me how he really didn’t want to hunt deer, because he didn’t want to kill an animal. I told him that was fine. Then after seeing Grandad’s buck, he started saying he wanted to go hunting when he was 5! Ha! He was pretty excited. Funny incident: Dennis had shot the deer a little further back than he normally does. It was still in the lungs, but it also nicked the gut…which he DOESN’T like to do. He has looked at so many pictures of deer with Nam (and he always points out where is the best place to hit the deer), that when Nam saw the bullet hole, he said, “Grandad, you hit it too far back!” This kid doesn’t miss a thing!

So for my Day 6 of Thanksgiving: I am thankful for the miracle of adoption! I have two beautiful grandsons that I wouldn’t have without it, and they have a loving family and more blessings than we can enumerate because of it. It also has provided me (and our family) a richness of understanding that I’m not sure we could have achieved otherwise. Plus it adds a little insight into our relationship with our Heavenly Father who chose to adopt us as his children.

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you moms out there! I hope that you are getting to spend your day with those who graced your lives and enabled you to become mothers. I am so thankful for my three! Even though they couldn’t all be here, I’m very blessed with their love (as well as their thoughtful and much appreciated gifts).

We celebrated a day early, since I really don’t like facing the restaurant crowds at lunchtime on Mother’s Day. We drove to FW and had lunch with Sheila and Nam. It was an extra special day, since this is Sheila’s first Mother’s Day to be a mom. Nam gave her the little wall hanging of his handprint that we made, as well as a Willow Tree that matches the ornament that he loves so much of “Momma and Nam”.  That kid loves my Willow Tree collection, so I wanted him to be able to enjoy having one at their house. He loves to look at them and ask, “Who’s that? What they doing?” A day doesn’t go by that he doesn’t go through our family, wanting to talk about how we are all related, and how we all became a family. Now that he has discovered our wedding album, he loves to go through it and talk about our marriage. He also loves to point to our wedding rings and my “mother’s ring” and ask us about their meaning. I know I’ve said it on numerous occasions, but that kid truly LOVES family!

We also celebrated Sheila and Nam’s 6 month anniversary this past week. It fell on the night that they normally sleep over at our house, so we had a special dinner of pho, stir-fry and egg rolls. It is hard to believe that a half-year has already gone by since Nam’s adoption! Even though his presence in our day to day life feels normal, now, I still find myself watching him with amazement from time to time. I am so thankful that God provided this incredible little guy for Sheila to adopt! He adds so much joy and life to our days. His progress is phenomenal. His pronunciation is still difficult to understand at times, and his grammar still has a ways to go, but his vocabulary and comprehension are probably either on target for his age, or slightly advanced. And he always finds a way to communicate so that he can be understood! (He is quite good at pantomiming!) He has such a loving and curious nature, and is SO cute, that he wins hearts wherever he goes! He can still be a little toot at times, but what 4-year-old boy isn’t? I love watching him learning about God’s love, about being kind, about showing respect to others, about trust and fidelity, and all of the other things that children normally learn from infancy. He is getting a late start in many areas, but he is soaking it in and making SO much progress! It is a privilege to be involved in this process and have a “front-row seat” to watching him blossom in his mother’s love and care!

Being a mother has always been my greatest desire and my most enjoyable "job"...up until I gained the new role of granny, that is. Each of my kiddos holds a very special place in my heart. Stephen, my firstborn, who taught me how to be a mother. Sheila, my daughter and my best friend. Ricky, my "baby" who has so much love and compassion in his heart. Jesse, who gave me the much anticipated and highly enjoyable role of being a granny. Shepherd, who broke my heart with his beautiful, sad eyes and later mended it with his amazing smile. Nam, who fills my days and heart with sunshine. And finally, little miss Gracie, my granddaughter that I can't wait to get to know. I am beyond blessed!

Praise ye the LORD. Praise, O ye servants of the LORD, praise the name of the LORD…He maketh the barren woman to keep house, and to be a joyful mother of children. Praise ye the LORD. (Psalms 113:1-9 KJV)

The past week...

It has been a busy week! Let me see if I can sort through it all…

Last Wednesday, we were sitting around the table after lunch. Nam was standing in his chair and someone saw a squirrel in the neighbor’s back yard. Nam turned around to look, leaned forward too much, and down went the chair…busting out a bottom pane on our bay window. It scared us all, but Nam didn’t have a scratch on him. Ricky cleaned up all of the glass and Dennis boarded it up until we can get a replacement pane. We have always wanted to put in double paned glass to save on energy, so I guess we will get started on that….

Thursday, I decided to bake cookies. I wanted to try Nam on oatmeal cookies again, but also made a batch of snickerdoodles, just in case. He liked the oatmeal cookies this time, but “snickermoodles” are still his favorite!

Tonette took her mom to the orthopedic doctor Thursday morning, and he determined that she had a couple of cracks in her foot, a bone cyst on her ankle and possibly a hairline fracture on it. He wants her to wear a boot and stay in a wheelchair until she is healed. Then Saturday morning, she woke up short of breath and was taken to the ER. Her hemoglobin was about 6.5 and she tested positive for blood in her stool, so she was admitted and given 2 units of blood. There was a GI convention going on, so they ended up sending her to a hospital in Arlington, which was supposedly the only one in the area to have a GI doctor on call for the weekend. They did an endoscopy on Sunday and a colonoscopy on Monday. They found a stomach ulcer and some internal hemorrhoids and diverticulitis, but none of them were the cause of the bleeding (which they never did find). Even though she had just had an iron infusion on the previous Monday, and was given 2 units of blood in the Weatherford ER, her hemoglobin only went up about one point. Then she had a bad nosebleed Monday night, which dropped it back to 6.8. They gave her another unit of blood yesterday. She still needs to have the test done where she swallows the camera capsule, so they can look throughout her digestive system, but they want her to do that as an outpatient with her normal GI doctor. She is also being referred to a hematologist to see why she is so anemic. We are hoping that she is released from the hospital today, but she has developed a bad cough, and they are going to do a chest xray first. She really needs to go into rehab for awhile until she can get around better in her boot. The girls are trying to get her into the one in Weatherford where she has been before. That will make it SO much easier on everyone!

Sheila had planned a First Night Bag party at Heather’s house on Saturday morning. There is a place in Weatherford that provides goods for foster families. They also put together 1^st Night Bags for foster kids which include PJs, toothbrush/toothpaste, underwear, socks and something fun. The idea of the party was for everyone to bring items for the bags and to assemble as many as we could to donate. We ended up having 12 filled bags and quite a bit of extras to donate. Nam and Asher had fun playing together, and with Bethany (who was great to look after them!). It was a good party (although I was a bit distracted with Bobbie’s situation)!

I had asked Jamae (Tonette’s daughter, who was helping with Bobbie that morning), if she could take Daddy with her over to Arlington, and then I would come later in the evening to pick him up. That saved me from having to make two trips over there that day! After I finished up at the party, I went home and took care of some things around the house. Then after supper, Dennis and I headed over there. Daddy was totally exhausted. I was afraid that he wouldn’t be able to make the long walk back through the hospital and out to the car. We had to stop several times for him to rest, but he finally made it. Sunday morning, we took him to church. Then while the other guys stayed for a business meeting, Daddy and I went back to Arlington for the afternoon. I was nervous about him wanting to stay with Bobbie at the hospital, and she asked him to, but this time he realized that he needed to go back home. We headed over first thing Monday morning and stayed until about 2:00. I needed to get home to cook supper for my bunch (Sheila and Nam spend Monday nights with us). We had hoped Bobbie would be released yesterday, but her nosebleed caused them to keep her another night. I am really hoping today is the day she gets to go back to Weatherford!

Yesterday morning was Daddy’s back procedure. They burned the nerve endings in his back to deaden the pain that he has been having for years. His legs were slow to “wake up” after the procedure, so I brought him home with me for a few hours, until he could walk ok on his own. Nam was really sweet with him. Every time Daddy had to get up, Nam would go hold his hand to help him. Then he would tell Dennis, “Grandad! Come help PawPaw! He too old, he needs help to walk!” I love watching how Nam interacts with Daddy…it is the sweetest thing!

Dennis dropped Daddy off on his way to take Nam home. I checked on him last night and this morning, and he is doing great. They had told us to expect him to have more pain at first from the procedure and that the “pain-free” benefits might take several weeks to kick in. He said he can already feel the benefits of the procedure and can stand up straight. He isn’t hurting at all…just fells some “tightness” in his back. I am SO thankful to see him feeling better already! I hope this “fix” lasts the rest of his life! I have business to take care of at home today, so I can’t drive him to Arlington. That will “allow” him an extra day to recover, which should also help. Hopefully, Bobbie will be moved to Weatherford today anyway!

Nam got a phone call from his primary caregiver from the orphanage on Sunday. He was thrilled to “face time” with her! The call has generated a lot more conversations. He talked to Sheila about one of his friends who “didn’t have a momma and daddy, they died”. Nam was really sad about that. Then he perked up and said, “Maybe Jesus will make him a new momma and daddy and he can come to America to live and have toys!” Sheila later found out that he has been adopted, so that makes everyone feel better!

Sheila contacted me last night to let me know that she had “the adoption talk” with Nam. I just sat and bawled over the things that he told her. But with his improved language skills, he can finally talk about his fears, so that Sheila can alleviate them (as best as she can). He is such a sensitive little soul! I’m SO thankful that Sheila decided to adopt him, and that she is doing such a wonderful job at providing the love and training that he needs!

Well, Dennis and Nam will be here soon and I’m still in my robe! I have enjoyed having this morning off! I was totally wiped out last night. I have to get ready today to testify in court tomorrow morning. That stresses me out BIG time! I’ve never had to testify on the stand before, and this is not going to be an easy case to start with. I don’t do well speaking before an audience in the first place. I know I don’t seem like a shy person, but I definitely suffer from “stage fright!” Plus there are a couple of lawyers that I am terrified to answer questions from. At least in our court, Judge Moore does NOT let the attorneys “bully” his CASAs.

Well, I really have to go! Happy (2^nd day of) Spring!

A day of peace and quiet! 😉

Today is the 4 month anniversary of Nam’s adoption. It’s hard to believe it has already been one-third of a year since he joined our family! But it is also getting hard to remember what our lives were like before he arrived…he has become such an integral part of our existence.

This week has been quite exhausting! I have a newfound respect for single parents. With Dennis and Ricky gone, I have had Nam by myself during the day, plus I’ve had to do all of the driving to pick him up. Trying to keep up with my normal chores, keeping him entertained, and dealing with any and all discipline issues has worn this old woman out! He was REALLY good Wednesday and Thursday. But I think he didn’t realize how long Dennis was going to be gone, and it started getting to him yesterday. He was really missing Grandad, and it definitely showed up in his behavior. I was ready to hand him off to Sheila last night and have a weekend to myself!

The guys made it all the way up to Carbondale, CO, near Aspen, yesterday and are headed back to Bayfield tonight. They expect to be home sometime Monday. I was hoping they would make it back then, since I kept telling Nam Grandad would be home in 3 days yesterday. We ended up calling and talking to him for a few minutes yesterday morning, which helped for a while. But afterwards, when he got upset, he would cry that he wanted to go see the snow with Grandad! I showed him on the map how far away it was, but I don’t think he really understood the concept.

Tonette was out of town this week and needed to get some medicine to her mom, so Thursday, we dropped by on our way home from FW to pick it up at the pharmacy and take it to Brookdale. As usual, Nam charmed everyone that we came in contact with! He is such a friendly little guy! Then we took the medicine to the office manager at Brookdale and dropped in to see Memaw and Pawpaw for a few minutes. Daddy had received his final refund check from an insurance policy that Momma had had (and had never been canceled when she died, that I’ve been working on trying to take care of for the past few months), and he said he needed to take it to the bank. I suggested he just endorse it and let me take it for him (so I could just go through the drive-thru and not have to get Nam in and out again). Bobbie also had a check she wanted me to cash, but she told me that I could just give her the money on Sunday. So, we ran those errands and then headed to the house. After lunch (and a good nap), we went to Walmart to buy a few groceries. Nam loves to operate the portable scanner that they now have. He does a really good job, too! Thursday night, I cooked chicken pot pie for supper and also prepared a (frozen) dish of mashed cauliflower with garlic and bacon bits. Nam ate two helpings of the pie and cauliflower, and then grabbed the serving dish of cauliflower and finished it off! I just love to watch this kid eat! He has a good appetite and eats such a wide variety of food (unless he is distracted or upset!).

Sheila has been working with Nam on learning everyone’s names (hers, mine and Grandad’s, and Nam’s full name). It is so cute to hear him tell you that he is Nam Josiah Gerrald! He really likes his middle name. Sheila read the story of Josiah from his children’s bible to him, so he knows he is named after a king. He does really well at remembering Sheila’s name and my name. For some reason, he has trouble remembering Dennis’. We have also been working on learning to catch a ball. It looks like he has never even had the opportunity to play with any kind of ball before. We have a tennis ball that we’ve been using to teach him. He is picking it up pretty well, but he gets so excited that he starts jumping around while he tries to catch it…which doesn’t work and frustrates him. He is also starting to turn into an outdoor-loving kid. He wasn’t very interested in playing outside when he first arrived from Vietnam. That’s probably because it was so much colder than he had ever experienced! Now that spring is just around the corner, he is loving going out to play. He really loves going to the park…especially when there are other kids to play with there. It really warms my heart to see him starting to act like “a normal kid”. He has made SO many adjustments and had to learn SO many new things, but he has really handled it very well!

Thursday night was Sheila and Nam’s night to spend the night. I normally fix pancakes once a week when they are here, so Friday was it. Nam ate 4 (small) pancakes for breakfast, and then wanted another one plus his bacon (that he didn’t eat at breakfast) as a morning snack. That kids LOVES pancakes! Yesterday afternoon, we decided to bake cookies. He wanted Snickerdoodles, so that’s what we did. He helped me mix up the dough, then I scooped and shaped it, and he rolled it in the cinnamon-sugar mixture and placed it on the baking sheet. He really likes being involved in whatever anyone is doing. I have a wooden step ladder that I keep in the kitchen for him to stand on. It reminds me of when I was little and used to “help” my Grandma Mahaffey in the kitchen. As Vicki F. likes to say all the time, “making memories”.

This morning I slept in until 7:40! What a luxury!!! I have quite a bit to get done today (writing a court report, doing laundry, cleaning house, and baking a cake for tomorrow), but I have all day by myself to get it all done, so I’m not getting in any hurry. I may not even get out of my PJs and robe until noon!

Since it would have been just me and the folks tomorrow for Sunday dinner, I invited Anita and Sherrod over to eat with us. Sherrod will be great for keeping the folks entertained! I don’t know about anyone else, but when I’m around someone a lot, I run out of things to talk about. Therefore, our Sunday afternoons are pretty boring! It will be nice to add another couple into the mix to liven things up.

Well, tonight we “spring forward”. I do NOT like time changes! It doesn’t affect me as bad as it does Dennis, but it does take a few nights to adjust. Sheila is actually looking forward to it this year. She is hoping that with the change, Nam will start sleeping until 6-6:30, instead of getting up every morning at 5-5:30! It will also give them more time in the evenings to do things together before it gets “black” outside. I hope the time change has no ill effects on you, and that you all continue to enjoy the joys of watching springtime arrive. (The pear trees, here, are gorgeous right now!)

Things that are praiseworthy

This granny's heart was overflowing when I arrived to pick up Nam this morning. He met me at the door just bursting with excitement, wanting to tell me about Jesus! He told me the account of when Jesus calmed the storm in the fishing boat and when the bad men hurt Jesus, but then he was "all better."

One of the main reasons Sheila adopted this sweet little Vietnamese boy was to be able to share the gospel with a child who might not ever have the opportunity of hearing it otherwise. She placed a poster in his room, at his eye level, that depicts the life of Jesus. She reads from his Children's Bible Story book every evening at bedtime. From the first night we had Nam, she has played him Wee Sing Bible Songs. Plus she has tried to explain, as best she can to a 4-year-old with a limited grasp of English, about God's love and what Jesus has done for us. Teaching the English words for things and actions is fairly easy. Teaching the English words for spiritual concepts, not so much. She managed to find a series of children's animated shows on Amazon Prime that depict different Biblical accounts in a way that children can see and understand, which is what prompted his excitement this morning. Now he can "see" Jesus and what He did and learn about His life and His death. It is wonderful to see my prayers being answered for this little guy as he begins to learn about the One who stilled the waters!

On another front, I took Daddy for his 3-month check-up last week. His A1C was 6.0, down another .3 points! His blood pressure was good also. He is doing really well, The doctor ordered more bloodwork to see how his kidney function is, but we haven't heard back on the results yet. I expect more good news though. Daddy has been very careful with his diet over the past several months, and it is really making a difference! He and Bobbie are both doing about as well as they have in over a year...maybe two. It is so nice to see how proper care has paid off! They have also decided to stay at Brookdale another year, since they are being so well cared for. (At least that was the word this week. No telling what it will be next week!) I'm thankful that they seem to be more content with their situation now. The employees at Brookdale also report that they are much more engaged with the activities provided now. They also have a new couple that eat their meals with them, and they are enjoying their company. They've also found a couple of ladies to play dominoes with! I'm hoping that this continues and they can be truly happy in their new home.

We also had the opportunity to attend JW and Janette's reception last Friday night in Cross Plains. We saw people there that we hadn't seen in decades! We enjoyed visiting with everyone and seeing the joy on JW and Janette's faces. I hope that they enjoy many years of happiness together!

These are just a few praiseworthy things that I wanted to share with you at the beginning of this new week. May you look for and find things in your life that are praiseworthy!

Nam's impact on my life

A few days ago, Sheila posted her first blog article since becoming a mother. Reading it filled my heart with love and joy over the blessings that we’ve received since we got Nam, and for the grace that my daughter has shown through it all. I am so proud of the mother that she has become, in a difficult situation, and I’m so thankful to be able to share in the care of this amazing little boy.

I’ve discussed our day-to-day routine, as well as Nam’s progress since he arrived, but I haven’t really gotten into the impact that he has had on our lives. We knew that this was going to be life-changing, but we really had no idea what to expect. Those first few weeks were HARD! Lack of sleep (both in Vietnam and back home) plus trying to help Nam adjust to a new world had us all struggling. Then when Sheila went back to work, we had to learn to deal with new challenges:  helping Nam feel safe and get used to traveling back and forth between two households, the effort of driving back and forth to FW every day, learning to discipline and train a child whose background we know very little about and who spoke a different language, and trying to keep up with our other responsibilities. There have been glitches and tears along the way, believe you me! But I wouldn’t trade our new lives for anything.

I know when people ask and I tell them how great Nam is, they think, “Yeah, typical grandmother speak!” But this little guy truly has been amazing and has brought SO much joy and laughter into our lives. He is smart…because he works at it! He has such a curious nature about him and LOVES to learn new things. He is funny and mischievous. He loves to tease and laugh. Sometimes he carries his teasing too far, so we have to try to reign him in…teaching him that teasing can hurt people’s feelings, which we DON’T want to do. But he finds joy in so many things, which inspires us to do the same. He has such a vivid imagination and can play for hours with the simplest of toys. His favorites are blocks and puzzles and Play-doh…and of course, his super heroes. He loves animals! He likes to watch nature videos, especially about the large cats in Africa. He has always used various toys (blocks, puzzle pieces, Play-doh) to play like they are animals. I ordered him a set of 6 plastic animals this week (which came in yesterday), and he didn’t put them down the rest of the day. He enjoys looking for deer (and horses and cows) along the roadway or in the state park. He can’t wait to get old enough to start hunting with Grandad! But most of all, he has a loving and tender heart! He can be very hard-headed at times, and downright mean occasionally, but he is (when not angry) very reasonable and listens to why he should behave in a certain way. He hates it when he ends up hurting someone, whether physically or emotionally, and is quick to make amends. He is generous with his “thank yous” and “I love yous” and hugs and kisses (unless he is in a teasing mood!). He loves to “help” with most chores. He is sensitive and self-conscious and a bit self-doubting about a few things. He is gentle with younger children and shares well.

I’ve never been a big “spoiling” kind of parent or grandparent. I don’t like to overload kids with toys and stuff. But I have really struggled with this and Nam. Seeing him find so much joy in playing with his things, and seeing how much he appreciates what he has, makes me want to buy him whatever he wants. I don’t, of course, but I do end up buying much more than I ever thought I would! We are quickly filling up both Sheila’s apartment and our living room!

I had wondered if I could physically hold up to caring for an active 4-year-old on a daily basis. It has been challenging, but not as much as I was concerned it would be. Of course, it really helps having Dennis as an active participant, especially since Nam prefers playing with Grandad! I’m pretty well able to keep up with my normal chores and activities. Dennis and I trade off transporting him back and forth, so I only have to drive two days a week, and Dennis drives two days. Grandad does most of the physically challenging play, and I focus on the more mentally stimulating activities. I have done my share of lion dancing and roughhousing and racing though! Ha! I do feel more aches and pains lately, but the trade-off is definitely worth it. Our lives were pretty routine and boring before he came along. Now they are filled with love and laughter and joy and wonder! There is nothing quite like seeing the world through the eyes of a 4-year-old orphan immigrant!

With his burgeoning language skills and his emotional adjustment, Nam has started talking more about his past in Vietnam. At first, he didn’t mention it or act like he missed it at all. We figure this was mostly a defense mechanism used to deal with his loss. Now that he is truly comfortable in his new life, he can look back with nostalgia and tell us about people and things that he liked or didn’t like. Sheila has made contact with the family of an 8-year-old girl from his orphanage, and they Skype once a week. She has recently found a family in France who adopted a boy that he was friends with in Vietnam, and they plan to do the same with him. Nam looks forward to these times of connecting with his old friends. As I’ve mentioned in previous blogs, we are preparing for attending the celebration of Tet in a couple of weeks. It will be really interesting to see how Nam reacts to being back in a predominantly Vietnamese setting. (The doctor at the international clinic warned us that it might be unsettling for him.) Along with the positive interactions, Nam has told us about a worker from the orphanage and another boy there that were “bad guys, Nam no love”. We are hoping to learn more as he learns more English and has the capacity to share some of his past experiences.

I think one of the biggest surprises is how healthy Nam is, both physically and emotionally. His bloodwork all came back within normal parameters…no diseases nor deficiencies. A large majority of children from institutional care have problems with attachment. Nam bonded with us from the very beginning. We’ve been very impressed with the apparently superior care that he received at the orphanage. We know that he faced his challenges (the scars on his head and body attest to that), but he is, for the most part, a very healthy and well-adjusted little boy.

Sheila achieved another major milestone yesterday. The judge signed the order that legally changes Nam’s name. He is now Nam Josiah Gerrald! We had thought that wouldn’t take place until 6 months after his Vietnamese adoption, but Sheila’s lawyer was able to push it through at an expedited pace. That will be very helpful with legal matters:  filing her income taxes and getting her adoption tax credit, avoiding duplicating paperwork, and such like. Plus it just feels good knowing that he now (legally) shares our name!

Besides the joy and love that Nam brings to our lives now, I am also enjoying the new dimension that motherhood adds to my relationship with Sheila. I am amazed at her patience and adaptability! She has never been a morning person, but Nam has been a persistently EARLY riser (usually waking up between 5 and 6 am). Although she still hopes he will eventually start sleeping a little later, it does have some advantages. It gives them some special time together in the mornings before she has to go to work. Evenings are pretty busy. We eat supper as soon as she gets here after work, then there is just a little time for them to play (especially on the nights that they drive back to FW)before it is time to start baths and settling down for bed. The time that we get to spend with Sheila is much greater now also. Before Nam, we usually only saw her once a week. Now we see her daily (except on weekends). Our relationship and roles are changing, but those changes only add a new richness to our family.

So how has Nam being in our day-to-day lives affected us? More than I can possibly elaborate! I am extremely thankful for this wonderful little blessing that has invaded our home and hearts!

What happened to our weekend?

I think I'm getting too old to do a 24 hour trip to Paris! We picked Sheila up at work on Friday to head that way. We had to take a little break, because Nam had a meltdown when we got back in the car after picking her up. We stopped by their apartment and allowed him to calm down, then headed out again. This time he did great! The trip was long and hard (a Friday afternoon, driving through the DFW area!). We had to detour around a couple of wrecks, which added quite a bit of time to the trip...along with the traffic delays. We only had to stop a couple of times:  once for supper and once for a bathroom and snack break. Nam knew we were going to a hotel, so instead of the normal "Are we there yet?" that most kids do, it was him pointing out the window and asking, "Hotel?" He finally went to sleep about an hour before we arrived in Paris. Since we got to our rooms around 9 pm, that really messed with his bedtime! He was wound up and didn't go back to sleep until about 11. Since we had booked 2 rooms, Dennis and I were able to get to sleep at our normal time. Poor Sheila! Staying up late didn't really alter Nam's wake up time, so she didn't get a very long rest.

After breakfast, we hung out at the hotel until around 9, and then headed over to Stephen's. Nam was really excited to see his cousins...and Uncle Stephen and Mandy. At this age, the boys engage in parallel play more than cooperative play. But they get along pretty well. Nam loved all of their trucks and cars, Jesse wanted to play camping in the dark (but Nam is scared of the dark), and all of the boys played with their collective super heroes. Shepherd went from one to the other. He and Nam probably play better together than Nam and Jesse. I didn't really see much jealous behavior though, which surprised me. Dennis mostly stayed in the living room and let the boys play in the bedroom, which I'm sure helped.

After Jesse opened his birthday gifts and lunch, we got back on the road for home. The trip back was easier, not as much traffic. Nam slept for about an hour. We only had to stop once for gas and snacks. I was really pleased with how well he made his first road trip!

We took Nam to visit Daddy and Bobbie last Thursday. We arrived as the residents were finishing lunch, so they all got to see Nam (which, of course, they all loved!). We stopped by the office manager's office, and she gave Nam candy...that is turning out to be her thing with him...it always earns her a hug! Then we went out to the courtyard and waited for the folks to finish up and come out. Nam was so sweet with them. We had talked with him beforehand that just like policemen and firemen and ambulance drivers (who he LOVES) help people, we need to help people. Pawpaw and Memaw get lonely and we can help them by visiting them and showing them we love them. So he interacted with them and gave them hugs and kisses...as well as ran and played. He really does have a sweet and loving heart!

I take Daddy to the pain management specialist this morning to see if they still recommend the nerve cauterization on his back. If so, they will fax the information to his kidney doctor to see if he will ok the procedure. Daddy's back has been giving him more trouble lately. I figure it is probably from all the cold weather we've been having, but it may be degenerating more. If the kidney doctor thinks it is safe, then we'll schedule the procedure as soon as possible to try to get him some relief.

We enjoyed a wonderful Lord's Day yesterday! Andy was our guest speaker, and then we went to James' and Renee's for our monthly potluck. Everyone seemed to be in an exceptionally good mood, and we all thoroughly enjoyed the day. Then we had our monthly singing service, which was even more exhilarating than usual. It was just a perfect day! I had gotten up really tired from the weekend, but I was feeling energized by the end of the day. I love Sundays like that...such a great way to begin a week!

Well, I need to get ready for Nam to arrive, and then to go get Daddy for his appointment. I hope you all have a wonderful week!

Getting into our new routine

Last week was a little crazy for Nam. Sheila had Monday off for MLK Jr. Day. He was supposed to have an appointment at the International Adoption Clinic on Tuesday morning. We weren’t sure if it would hold or not, because that was the night that we were supposed to have frozen precipitation. We all got up early to check on road conditions, which turned out to be fine, but the clinic called to cancel because the doctor was ill. So Dennis went to pick up Nam Tuesday morning, while I went to court on my CASA case. I ended up spending all morning in court. Our case was held for last, since the dad had to be “benched” from prison in Abilene. Then, since it was the trial, there was a lot of testimony to be heard. Around 12:30, the judge called a recess. One of the attorneys involved in the case had been sick and needed to go home, so the hearing had to be rescheduled for a future date. It was 1:00 before I made it back to Mineral Wells. Dennis and Nam had waited on me, so we met up at McDonalds for lunch.

Sheila came over after work and they spent Tuesday night. Nam did well throughout the week when Sheila left for work. He had a little trouble Wednesday morning, but he didn’t cry…just didn’t want to let go of his momma! His clinic appointment had been rescheduled for Thursday morning, so I spent Wednesday night with them, so I could go with Sheila and help out. Nam really likes for Granny to have a sleep over at his house. You could tell he was nervous about the doctor appointment. The appointment time was 11:30, so we stopped and ate lunch before going to Children’s. When we arrived at the hospital complex, we weren’t really sure where to park. We parked in the first garage we came to and then started trying to figure out where to go. Thankfully, we ran into a hospital employee who was kind enough to show us how to get to the clinic, and it was an easy walk to get there. The clinic is great! I really liked the doctor (actually nurse practitioner) who saw Nam. She is the mom of a 19 year old daughter that she adopted from China as an infant, so she is personally experienced in international adoption. That is very helpful! She laid out a play mat and a crate of toys for Nam to play with and observed him while asking Sheila questions. She also had him perform a few tasks to see how he was in his development. He is pretty much on target in every area! He has had very little experience with coloring or drawing, which was his “lowest score”. His size is small, but about what is expected for an Asian child. She then examined him thoroughly and did bloodwork. He didn’t like that, but handled it extremely well. Sheila had him watching a video on her phone, which did well at distracting him. Whenever he would look at the needle in his arm, he would frown and say “OUCH!”, over and over again until we distracted him again. He never did cry though. I’m not sure how many vials they took, but it was several. They are testing him for EVERYTHING!

After his checkup, we headed back to Sheila’s apartment. Nam went to sleep on the way, so when we arrived, we took turns sitting in the car with him while the other one went in to retrieve our things. Then I got in my car and we both drove to Mineral Wells. Nam woke up on the west side of Weatherford and was upset that I wasn’t still in the car, so when we turned onto Hwy 180, I passed their car, so that he could see me. Then he was fine. I had asked Dennis to go buy some shrimp, so we could do a shrimp fry for supper. Nam LOVES shrimp…as do the rest of us! He and Sheila spent Thursday night with us (which is our normal schedule).

Nam has been very excited about the upcoming celebration of Tet…the Vietnamese celebration of the Lunar New Year. He had been having Sheila play the drum (a popcorn tin), so he could do the Lion Dance. Dennis decided to make him some “real” drumsticks, instead of the plastic spoons he had been using. Then he found a 5 gallon plastic bucket that we overturned and used for his drum. There is no telling how many times we took turns doing the Lion Dance while Nam played the drum! Over the weekend, Sheila received a traditional Vietnamese outfit that she had ordered for him. He looks SO cute in it…and is very proud of it. It will be fun to attend the festival next month with him!

Dennis and I both took Nam home Friday afternoon, so we decided to eat in FW and then take in a movie. It has been a long time since we’ve done that! It was a nice break!

I started a new crochet project last week and worked on it a lot over the weekend. It is a nice thick afghan to go in the guest room. I’ve gotten it over half-way finished. It is made with bulky yarn, so it works up pretty quickly. When I finish it, I have a baby blanket to crochet for a special little girl coming in April.

We are back on our regular schedule for the beginning of this week:  Sheila and Nam spending tonight. I’m not sure how we will work the end of the week, since we are planning a trip for the four of us to Paris. We will meet up with Sheila after work on Friday and head that way. We will be staying in a hotel, which will make it much easier on everyone. Jesse’s birthday party is planned for Saturday afternoon, but Nam really isn’t ready for a big “to-do” yet, so we’ll just celebrate with him Saturday morning and then leave after lunch. Hopefully that will allow Nam to get a GOOD nap on our way back to FW. It will be interesting to see how well he does on a trip. His last trip was from Hanoi to Texas, so this one ought to go much better!

He is making so much progress! His language skills are improving daily. He is learning new words and saying the words that he already knows more clearly. He is speaking in simple sentences. And he understands just about everything we say. He is a master puzzle assembler! He eats well, eating just about anything we put in front of him. (Although he still isn’t crazy about cheese.) Last week we learned about cactus, and now he points them out alongside the road between MW and FW. He loves animals! Playing with or watching African animals is about his favorite thing ever! He also loves super heroes, although some have a tendency to turn evil at times. He has the evil laugh that bad guys do down pat! He is fascinated with the Lion Dance right now and will reenact it or use his blocks to pretend they are lion dancers and the people who are watching it. He is a prolific builder using his blocks! They usually end up being animals or guns though…or robots. He has a very active imagination!

Grandad and I are getting into our new routine as daily caregivers and are holding up pretty well for the most part. We are starting to take turns driving to FW and back every day, rather than both of us going, so that helps. Nam is starting to spend more time in independent play, which also helps! At first, he thought we, or at least Grandad, needed to be playing with him constantly. We had to explain that we can’t do that all of the time…that we have work to do sometimes. He and Grandad take a nap together after lunch every day. Nam naps really well when he is lying on Grandad’s chest on the couch in the den!

I’m hoping that the weather is mild enough this week to go visit Pawpaw and Memaw in the Brookdale courtyard. He just doesn’t do well in their apartment. But there is room to romp and play outside, and it is good for the folks to get out and get some fresh air, too.

Well, it has taken me all morning to get this finished! For some reason, I have a hard time sitting still for very long at al time. Ha, ha! I hope that you all have a wonderful week and that this more moderate weather continues for awhile!

Sheila's 1st week back at work

Well, Nam did very well for his first week of Sheila going to work. It was hard on both of them, but he improved every day. It is so sweet to watch him work up his courage to tell her bye in the morning! Sheila has worked out a routine that I think will work best for everyone.

My appointment with the orthopedic doctor went well. My shoulder problem is, as I expected, a torn rotator cuff. There isn’t any nerve damage, so he felt like I would benefit best from a steroid shot. He said it might take up to a week or more for it to take effect, but I could tell a difference by that night. It is SO nice to sleep pain-free! I’m hoping the effects of the shot will last several months. I don’t plan to ever have surgery on it, unless it gets so bad I can’t use my arm, which I don’t expect. Surgery on tendons takes too long to recover!

Friday, we took Nam to visit Daddy and Bobbie. He is so sweet! He gets excited to go see them. We can’t stay long, because their apartment is so small and crowded that he doesn’t have room to play, and he has too many temptations to get into. He’s really pretty good about NOT getting into stuff he’s not supposed to, but their place is just filled with too many things that are at his level.

After our visit with them, we took him to Thiess and Gina’s. It was Thiess’ first time to meet him. He was smitten! Nam was more interested in all of the critters around their place:  3 dogs, cats, cows, horses…not to mention a tractor! He will love going to stay with them from time to time!

The three grandsons finally got to get together Friday night and Saturday morning. We all met up for supper at a pho restaurant. Nam was SO excited to meet his cousins! On the drive to FW, he kept singing “Daddy Finger” (very exuberantly!) and just breaking out in laughter for no apparent reason. As soon as we arrived, he climbed up in Stephen’s car and started hugging the boys. It took a little while for Jesse and Shepherd to warm up, but by the end of supper, they were playing well together. Stephen’s family went to Sheila’s so the boys could have some play time, and Dennis and I came on home, so as not to get in the way. I look forward to the next time we all get together, so I can watch them interact with one another.

I was really looking forward to a day off Saturday, but we had two deer to butcher. That, along with other chores, took up most of the day. I never did get to feeling rested up over the weekend. I had hoped to sleep in Saturday morning, but I ended up being up most of the night with a sinus headache. My headache eventually went away, but it sure left me feeling draggy.

When we picked up Daddy and Bobbie yesterday morning for church, Bobbie sounded awful. She had come down with a cold a few days earlier, and it sounded like it was trying to settle in her chest. She had a terrible cough. After lunch (which she only ate a few bites of), Dennis took them back home so she could rest. Tonette is taking both of them to the dermatologist this afternoon, so she will be able to determine if her mom needs to go see her primary care doctor. There is a lot of stuff going around right now! Ricky was sick all weekend, too. He went on to work today, but he sure didn’t feel like it!

Sheila and Nam came over last night to spend the night. That will be our normal routine, so Nam doesn’t have to be shuffled around on Monday mornings. He wakes up so early that he and Sheila have some snuggle time in the morning before she has to leave for work. He did NOT like the idea of her going back to work after having her to himself all weekend. He likes “Momma and Nam, ALL day!” But we managed to make it through the goodbyes without any tears.

Dennis and Nam went driving through the state park this morning while I cleaned up and started my daily routine. Then we had to have some Playdoh time. After that they went out to the shop to build a step stool for Nam to use to reach the sink for washing up. Now they are working on a tool box for Nam’s tools. He just LOVES doing stuff with Grandad!

So far, this fulltime grandparenting is going very well. Even though I enjoy the free (rest!) time we have when he leaves, I still miss him and look forward to the next time he is here. He definitely adds a huge new dimension to our lives and makes everything more fun!  The 2 month anniversary of his adoption is Wednesday. It really feels like he has been with us much longer. I'm amazed at how much he has learned and how well he has adjusted in such a short time. He has turned out to be a major blessing to all of us!

Travels and tears

My heart is breaking for the Avaritt family as they mourn the loss of dear Brother Kenneth. He was a special guy and will be missed by so many! When I think of him, I will always remember his deep voice, his twinkling eyes, his “Hello, Sugar”, and his HUGE heart. As a child, he seemed like a somewhat intimidating man; but as I grew to know him more personally, I realized what a sweetie he was. He had a strong love for God which directed everything he did and had a deep love for people and a committed desire to serve. He also had genuine humility. I sure loved that man, as many of you did, and the world just won’t be the same without him. However, I know that he is better off now. The last few years have been very hard on him, and now he can rest from the pain and sorrow that he had to endure. Our loss, his gain!

We enjoyed our short trip to Paris last week. Stephen and Mandy had a company party to attend, so we stayed with the boys. We spent the whole evening camping and battling coyotes! We would hike through the Grand Canyon looking for “tails” (we had brought the boys a book from there that identified different animals living in the Canyon by their tails). We would gather firewood from the bathroom and hallway and then cook marshmallows over the fire. But the most fun was when a couple of us would hide (either in the closet or under blankets) while the other two chased off those pesky coyotes! You would not believe how many of those critters they had in their house! Ha ha!

We were a little concerned about how the boys would do at bedtime, because they (Jessie in particular) do NOT like to go to bed when company is around. I guess we had worn them out, though, because after reading a couple of books to them, they crawled in bed and went to sleep, and we never heard a peep out of them! When Stephen and Mandy made it home, Dennis and I were dozing on the couch. Those boys had worn us out, too!

After a little more playtime Friday morning, we went out to each lunch with them before heading back homeward. We stopped at Sheila’s to visit with her and Nam on the way. Sheila cooked us supper and then we went driving around looking at Christmas lights. We found this one house that was amazing! It had lights choreographed to music that you tuned into on the car radio. We sat and watched the lights for a LONG time…through four or five songs. It was so fun to watch Nam, who was mesmerized by the whole thing. After each song, we would all clap and cheer! Nam finally started getting sleeping in the dark car, so we went back to their apartment and played some more until his bedtime. He did really good again! He gave us hugs, told us he loved us and then bid us goodbye as he saw us to the door. I think he got a bit teary a little later on and had to call us to get cheered up again. If he had his way, the four of us would all live together in the same house. It is so hard for him to wait patiently for our visits! I have to admit to getting a little teary-eyed myself. That little fella has sure wound his way into our hearts. I think I miss him as much as he misses us when we are apart!

We had brought gifts from Stephen and Mandy and Daddy and Bobbie for Nam, plus I’d brought him a pair of overalls that I’d ordered for him. As soon as he saw the overalls, he started stripping down to put them on. He LOVED being dressed like Grandad! He would put on Dennis' hat and say that he was Grandad! Then he opened Stephen and Mandy’s gift and found some PJ Mask pajamas (as well as some other neat goodies). He was super excited about that, too, and couldn’t wait to put them on! Then he opened the Mickey and Minnie Mouse that “Memaw and Papaw” had sent. He would hug them and call them “Baby Granny” and “Baby Grandad”. It was quite an exciting evening!

In some ways it is hard believe that Nam has been with us a whole month. In other ways, it feels like he has always been with us. He still has his struggles, and he is a 4-year-old boy (with all THAT entails), but he is one of the sweetest little guys I've ever known. Sheila really hit the jackpot with this kid! Even though we felt like we could "read" his personality from his early pictures, we didn't know what he was actually going to be like. But the pictures really did accurately portray his character. He is sweet, mischievous, fun-loving and sensitive...all the things that we could see in his face from the beginning. Our family has really been blessed by having him join it!

Janette D. is coming to spend the night tonight, so she can ride with us to Benton tomorrow. We want to leave fairly early, so we’ll have time to check into our rooms before the visitation tomorrow evening. We will stay until after the funeral Wednesday and then head back home. I have court on Thursday morning, and then Sheila and Nam are coming over to spend Thursday night with us. So this week is pretty full!

I’m looking forward to seeing many of you this week, even though the occasion will be a sad one. Praying for safe travels for all who will be on the road!

A Successful Journey Home

We are home, safe and sound!

Our stay in Hanoi was our least favorite of the trip. It seems like everything we did ended up being difficult. When we arrived at our hotel, we were informed that we didn’t have a room. Our original plans and reservations were for arriving on Friday. The booking agent had not informed us that they hadn’t been able to secure us a room for Thursday night. Our “guide” from Dillon abandoned us, so we were left to deal with the mix-up on our own. The hotel was great, though. They secured us a room at a sister hotel across town, arranged for a taxi to take us there, and even sent one of their staff with us to facilitate everything. The biggest problem was that we were traveling with a little boy that didn’t understand why we were having to move AGAIN and was very cranky! Once we got in our (extremely nice) room, he settled in as usual.

Friday morning, our guide was supposed to meet us in the lobby to take us to the US embassy to pick up Nam’s visa and do the interview. We waited in the lobby for about 15 minutes, with Nam getting crankier every minute, and finally received a phone call from the original hotel telling us that he was waiting for us THERE, and we needed to catch a taxi to meet up with him. (We had contacted him the previous evening and made arrangements for him to meet us at the hotel that we ended up staying in.) Sheila’s interview was at 10:00, and if we were more than 20 minutes late, we would lose our spot and have to go back at another time (which might possibly knock us out of our new flight schedule). Thankfully, we were able to make it to the hotel, meet up with him and made it to the embassy at 10:00 on the dot! We got in, turned in the necessary paperwork, and Sheila did her short interview. We were told it would take about 20 minutes to process the visa. An hour later, we were still waiting…and struggling to keep Nam occupied. It is hard to sit in a government office for over an hour with an active (almost) 4 year old boy, and with NOTHING with which to entertain him (our phones had been confiscated at the entrance of the embassy). He is a very sociable little boy, so he visited with the security guards, the cleaning lady, and any one else who happened by. Thankfully, there was a little snack bar just outside the waiting room that sold bananas, so he was able to have a little snack while waiting. (You do NOT want this child to get hungry…he gets very hangry!) Sheila finally got his visa (they were having printer problems), and we headed back to the hotel to pack up and move to our hotel that we were supposed to be in. Of course, check-out time at the first hotel was noon, and check-in time at the second was 3:00 pm, so we had a couple of hours that we had to kill before we could get settled. We ate lunch and found a playroom for Nam to blow off some steam in and then were FINALLY able to get settled in our apartment. We were now through with everything official, so we just camped in our rooms for the next couple of days. We used the hotel restaurant for breakfast and ordered in food to be delivered all weekend, as the area our hotel was located was NOT a good place to be walking around with a rambunctious 4 year old in tow. (It really wasn’t a good place for US to be walking around in!) Those last 36 hours or so were VERY long!

The time to go to the airport finally arrived! We gathered up our luggage, woke Nam up, and got a taxi to the airport. The drive was quite beautiful! The lights of the city were mesmerizing. We had a bridge to cross that had these amazing arches over it with lights that reflected on them in various colors. Nam practiced his English on the drive. He is such a smart little guy. We could hear him whispering to himself, saying a work in Vietnamese first, then saying the English word equivalent:  colors, animals, people’s titles. He obviously knew that we were going to America where he was going to have to speak in English, and he wanted to be prepared.

We had a few difficulties at the Hanoi airport. We didn’t have our e-tickets, since the flights had been changed, and we didn’t know where to go. We were first directed to one check-in, which informed us to go to a different one. We had hoped that flying out at midnight would mean a less crowded airport, but THAT didn’t happened. We finally made it to the correct desk and handed over our passports and Nam’s adoption paperwork. They scrutinized EVERY page very closely and acted like we were criminals or something. It was very unnerving! (We were in a communist country!) Finally, they approved our documentation, checked our luggage and sent us on our way. We made it to the next line we had to navigate, made it to the front and were redirected, because there was an issue with our luggage! Thankfully it just turned out to be the portable battery charger that needed to be moved from my checked luggage to carry-on. We went back to the long line to wait again, but as we got close enough for the security guard to recognize us, he went ahead and let us through. Then we had about an hour to kill before time to board. By this time, Nam was getting a bit cranky. We bought him a snack and tried to amuse him the best we could until we finally boarded our plane. Thankfully, he went right to sleep as soon as we took off and slept pretty much the whole 5 hour flight to Seoul. That was SO helpful, as the airplane we were on for this leg was the worst either of us had ever been on! (I do NOT recommend ever flying on Jin Air!) This was the only part of the whole trip when I was tempted to use my emergency medication for anxiety. Sheila and I both were feeling pretty claustrophobic by the end of the flight, and my back was killing me. Neither of us got any sleep. We finally landed in Seoul and had about 4 hours until our final flight home.

Let me just say that our “layover” in Seoul did not go well.

FINALLY, we boarded our (wonderful Korean Air) plane and started the final 12 hour leg to the good ole US! Any flight that lasts that long is going to be a struggle, and adding a travel-weary little boy to the equation made that struggle even greater. Nam slept some, played some, struggled some, watched Frozen a couple of times (which he loved!), and tried starting up conversations with our fellow travelers. That boy is VERY social! We had “met” a couple of families while waiting in Seoul. Every time he saw them from then on, they would call out and talk to each other. One was a Vietnamese family that lives in Dallas. They were wonderful! They were able to communicate with Nam and help us out some with his frustrations. The other was a Korean born woman, who had been adopted by Americans as a baby, who had returned to Korea with her daughter. She couldn’t communicate with Nam, but they were still able to make friends! Sheila and I enjoyed our visits with her.

After a couple of rough patches on the plane, Nam started getting really excited as we neared the end of our flight. He was SO looking forward to meeting his Grandad! About an hour away from DFW, he couldn’t stand it any more and just started crying and calling out “ông nội!, ông nội!”, (the Vietnamese word for grandfather) over and over again. It was SO sad! We finally got him settled down by showing him the video of Dennis singing and talking to him. Then we landed at DFW!

The process of going through immigration and customs went very smoothly, other than having to wait in the long lines. Then we made it to the receiving party! Dennis, Stephen’s family, Teddy, Leslie and Bellamy, and Gina were all there to welcome us home. Nam was a little shy at first, then when Sheila played the “Grandad video” for him, he recognized Dennis and was ecstatic! He clung to him and hugged on him like his life depended on it! He didn’t have much to do with anyone else. The boys finally “met” each other and sweet Jesse shared one of his matchbox cars with Nam. It will take some time for the three of them to really gel as buddies. There is going to be some major jealousy over Grandad to deal with!

After spending quite some time greeting each other and visiting, the crowd dispersed and we finally loaded up and headed to Sheila’s apartment. I had my concerns about Nam riding in his carseat, but he thought it was pretty cool to have his own special seat that allowed him to see out of the car. When we arrived at the apartment, he settled right in! He has seen pictures of everything, in his book that Sheila had sent him, so he KNEW he was home! He thoroughly explored his bedroom, pointing out all of the elephants (which happens to be his favorite animal). He then started exploring the rest of the apartment. He found our family picture (that was on the cover of his book) in the living room. He got really excited and decided that it belonged in HIS room! It was so heartwarming to see him process that he was finally in his permanent home!

Dennis and I spent Monday night at Sheila’s, to give Nam a little time to process, and also for Dennis to allow Sheila and I to get some sleep (we hadn’t been able to sleep for the previous 40 hours). Sheila put Nam down in his bed and made herself a pallet beside him. Unfortunately that didn’t last very long. Nam was used to sleeping in the same bed with his Momma and kept waking up and reaching out for her. Finally, around 2 am, Sheila decided to blow up the air mattress that Dennis had brought, so they could sleep together. (Dennis and I were sleeping in her bed.) I helped her get them situated. By this time, Nam was awake and wanting Grandad, so he spent the rest of the night entertaining Nam, while Sheila and I tried to get caught up on sleep. That allowed the two of them some great bonding time (as if they needed it!). I woke up around 8 and traded places with Dennis, so he could get a little rest. Nam slept for a couple more hours, which allowed Sheila and Dennis to get some much needed sleep.

After everyone was up, I cooked us a late breakfast, then we went for a walk outside. The walking trail led us through a construction area, which totally fascinated Nam! He got to watch the equipment scoop mud from the channel bank and load it into dump trucks to be hauled off. Every time a truck drove by, we would all wave and they would honk for him. He REALLY got a kick out of that! We finally headed back to the apartment, visited and played, and then had a light lunch. Then it was time for Dennis and I to leave, and for Nam to take a nap. Poor little guy was heartbroken! We left, and Sheila was finally able to calm him down (with Grandad’s video and pictures of me that Nam had taken) and get him to sleep…telling him that they would be coming to visit us “tomorrow”.

It felt WONDERFUL to finally get home! I was terribly jet-lagged, so I didn’t accomplish anything other than unpacking and putting on a load of laundry. We went out to eat supper, and I was able to eat salad for the first time in 2 weeks! (We avoided fresh veggies in Vietnam, because of their poor water quality.) I managed to stay awake (with the help of some coffee) until 9:00, to try to get my circadian rhythm back in sync with our local time. I went right to sleep, but woke up every two hours. I finally had to get up around 5:30, because my old body couldn’t stand being in bed any longer. I feel pretty rested, though, and my jet-lag headache is finally gone. Today I will buy my groceries for Thanksgiving dinner (I picked up my smoked turkey last night), bake a pecan pie and cornbread for my dressing, and clean house. I’m not sure what time Sheila and Nam will be coming over. I’m sure he’ll be wanting to leave as soon as he wakes up! They will spend tonight with us and all day tomorrow. It will be a very special Thanksgiving Day, for sure! (It will just be the 5 of us this year. We didn't think Nam would be up to the whole family quite yet!)

I want to thank all of you who kept us in your prayers and wished us well during our travels. There were SO many times that we felt like God was smoothing our path along the way. Even though we had our difficulties, things went incredibly well! We believe that your prayers definitely played a part in our successful journey!

Vietnam, here we come!

Two more days. It is hard to believe that it is almost here. I’ve got my bags all packed, except for a few last minute items. I have my money exchanged. All of the travel and accommodation arrangements are made. All that’s left is flying over to Vietnam and getting our little boy (plus all of the hoops that Sheila will have to jump through to enable Nam to return home with us).

I appreciate any and all prayers for the safety of the children at the orphanage in Nha Trang, where Nam is. The typhoon passed through there and did some damage, with a few casualties, but from what Sheila was able to find out from her Vietnamese contact, the orphanage and children there are fine. Praise God for that! The storm has moved out of the area, so our travels shouldn’t be hindered. They are still in the monsoon season, so it will be rainy and hot, but we have been expecting that.

I want to thank, again, all of those who have been so supportive of Sheila and our family throughout this process. That sweet boy is going from having lived his whole life in a state-run orphanage, without anything that he can call his own, to having a fully furnished bedroom with all of the clothes that he needs (plus!) and everything else a four year old could need or want. It has been an emotional roller coaster for all of us…Sheila, especially. Knowing that there are so many out there who support and encourage her is more helpful than you can imagine! It hasn’t been easy for her to make this decision and then spend countless hours researching all of the problems that she might face. Believe me, if there is a possible negative consequence that adopted children might suffer from, she is pretty much an expert on the subject by now. That would terrify me, but it comforts her to be informed and prepare herself for what might happen. Adopted children almost always suffer from trauma, whether it be physical or emotional. Just growing up in an institution, no matter how good it might be, leaves scars on children. Nam is going to need a lot of love and stability and understanding and assistance in dealing with any scars that he may have, and I believe Sheila is ready to help him through whatever it is he has to face. Of course, Dennis and I are here to help her and him in whatever way we can. Plus Thiess and Gina (the appointed other grandparents) and Sheila’s church family are all on board to assist, too! My heart is full from such an outpouring of love and support!

Other than adoption preparations, this week has been filled with doctor appointments (for Daddy); hunting (for Dennis – he harvested a nice doe this morning); getting things ready, here, for me being gone three weeks (paying bills for the month, taking care of CASA stuff, buying groceries for my guys, etc); and trying to see to Coez as much as possible (she is in swing bed and making good progress). Daddy and Bobbie are doing well and are excited to meet their new great-grandson when we return. Coez is making improvements every day. She is also very excited for Sheila and gave her one of the quilts that she had made for Nam. She has been telling all of her doctors and nurses all about our upcoming trip! Even the people that I’ve met through my CASA work are super excited for us! (Of course, I talk about it with EVERYONE!)

Of course there will be hardships along the trip: 20+ hours of flying one-way, being away from Dennis for almost 3 weeks (a first for us), not being able to assemble with the church for 2 Lord’s Days (but I am taking elements for the Lord’s Supper, so we can privately observe it), and dealing with jet lag and the emotional roller coaster that we are most certainly going to experience as we meet Nam and take him from all that he’s ever known. I fervently ask for your prayers…for safe travels, for strength to face whatever we have to, and especially for Nam to have an easy transition. It is incredible to realize how much we already love that little boy, even though we’ve never seen him or spoken with him. It will be challenging to comfort and interact with him without breaking down when he is in distress. I’m almost 60 years old and I’ve never had to face what he is about to. Even though we hope that he is excited to have a family and looking forward to his new life, he will go through grief at leaving his only known “home” and friends. He will have to learn a new language, travel half-way across the world to an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar people who look different from him, and learn a whole new way of life. That’s a LOT for a barely 4 year old little boy! I believe that eventually he will be happy and well adjusted, Lord willing, but it will be a process. So please keep us all in your prayers, that we may get through this with as little trauma as possible!

Well, I could go on and on, but I guess I’d better finish the things that I have to do today. We plan to leave here to go pick up Sheila and Jessica at 5:30 Monday morning. We want to get to the airport plenty early to get checked in and have time for brunch before boarding. It is going to be a LONG day…leaving DFW at 10:50 am and arriving in Ho Chi Minh City Tuesday night (their time). I’m hoping to be able to post some while we are in Vietnam, but I don’t know how good the WiFi will be in our hotels, and my cellphone will be on airplane mode the whole time (so NO cell service). But I do promise to post pictures at some point in time, so stay tuned!

Ready, Set.....

Things are about to get pretty busy. Our meeting starts tonight. I've got all of my baking done and just have a little more food prep to do. I've started cleaning house and plan to finish (what I have time for) today. My company (Kay and Diane) aren't coming until tomorrow, so I still have a little wiggle room. I've been so distracted with other things that I really haven't thought much about the meeting. Now that it is here, I'm really looking forward to it:  seeing everyone (we're expected a really good crowd), hearing the speakers, and spending the weekend growing in the Lord. I'm needing the booster!

This week has not turned out like I expected. We started it out by going to Henrietta Creek last Sunday. We enjoyed our visit with the congregation there, plus having a little extra time with Sheila. On our drive home, I got a call from my Aunt Coez. She was having some problems and needed a ride to the ER. We were still in FW, but I told her if she couldn't find anyone else before we made it back to MW, that we'd take her as soon as we got there. When we got to Weatherford, I checked on her again, and she was on her way. She was able to get in touch with one of her grandsons to take her. When we got to MW, I dropped Dennis and Ricky off at the house and headed to the hospital. She was still in the ER, but they had already decided to admit her. She was diagnosed with diverticulitis and started on IV antibiotics and given something for pain. I stayed until they got her settled into her room. It has been a rough week for her! She is still having quite a bit of pain, but they have her back on solid foods again. They were thinking about releasing her yesterday, but she hurt her leg somehow and is having a lot of pain with that...and can't get up and around. They did a MRI on it yesterday, but they hadn't told her the results yet last night when I was there. She's not able to get around and take care of herself right now, because of her leg pain and from being so weak. They are talking about either moving her to a swing bed (if she qualifies) or sending her to rehab for a few days to build her strength back up. She lives by herself, and there is no way that she could manage on her own in her present condition. The timing is really bad for me being able to help out much right now! Please continue to remember her in your prayers. She has taken care of SO many people during her lifetime (including me!), and I hate to see her not even being able to take care of herself. I wish I could do more for her.

We are down to 10 days until we leave for Vietnam! Sheila talked to Dillon on Tuesday and got some very helpful information about what to expect on the trip and when we get Nam. We will have a guide with us the whole time to help with travel arrangements, interpreting and helping us wade through all of the details of handling an overseas adoption (which are many!). Since we will be getting on an airplane back to HCMC the same day as the adoption ceremony, it will be invaluable to have him help with Nam...explaining everything to him and helping calm him as he tries to understand the changes taking place.

We had good news from Daddy's nephrologist this week! His kidney function INCREASED from 31% to 43%. The doctor started him back on the BP medicine that he had stopped, but just reduced the dosage. He also started him on a low salt/potassium/phosphorus diet. I'm not sure what that is going to entail...I haven't looked into it yet. It will raise his rates at Brookdale, which he isn't going to like. I am still waiting to hear back from the office manager on how much of a difference it will make. I'm really happy to see that his kidneys are still healthy enough to respond positively to lifestyle changes. From what we'd read on the internet, when they drop below 30%, the damage is irreversible, and he was awfully close to that! I'm really hoping that we can keep him off dialysis!

Well, today is Stephen's 33rd birthday. It is hard to believe! I remember this day 33 years ago quite well...and my memory is usually not good enough to remember that far back. I remember how terrified I was at becoming a mother...afraid that I couldn't do it! Then after that first night home from the hospital, I was sure I couldn't! LOL! But I soon learned that I could and started enjoying the thrill of being the primary caregiver to another little person. It fills my heart with wonder to think that Sheila is about to embark on the same journey. The circumstances may be different, but the love and joy and amazement of motherhood is the same. Just as a mother falls in love with her unborn child as she carries it for 9 months, I've watched Sheila fall deeply in love with Nam over the past 18 months as she has prepared for this new adventure. Motherhood is the greatest calling a woman can have, and I'm so very thankful that she is able to achieve it...even as a single woman. It will be more challenging, but I have confidence that she will be an amazing mom!

Well, I need to get started on my activities of the day. It is time to start on this whirlwind!

16 Days!

That's how many days are left until we board the plane for Vietnam, Lord willing. Things have really been popping this week! Sheila received our visas on Monday. (That was FAST!) Then Tuesday we had an adoption date set...November 10! We have our itinerary and plane tickets purchased. I've notified my credit card company of my travel plans, as well as the State Dept. Travel insurance, purchased. Packing list, finalized. Last minute purchases, made. Carry on bag, mostly packed. It's hard to believe, after all of these MANY months of waiting, that the time is just around the corner now!

The girls are having one last "hurrah" before Sheila becomes a mother. Heather and Allison came down to spend the weekend with Sheila, and they, with Jessica and Stacey, have been enjoying their time together. We plan to head over to HC for services tomorrow to see the girls. I also need to pick up my visa and passport from Sheila and get them packed. Sheila and I have been texting back and forth constantly all week. SO many things to talk about and plans to make!

Other than travel plans, I spent 3 days taking folks to doctor visits. I took my Aunt Coez to FW on Monday. We had lunch together and then, on our way home, we dropped off to visit Daddy and Bobbie. It was Coez's first time to see their home at Brookdale. Then Thursday and Friday, Daddy had his Mohs surgery on his nose and skin graft. Both went well, and he goes back in 2 weeks to get his stitches out. We go back to the kidney specialist on Tuesday to find out the results of the tests that he had done. I'm really interested in finding out what he has to tell us.

I also got some baking done this week. I made snickerdoodles and a pecan pie for our upcoming meeting (next weekend!). I also made a batch of oatmeal cookies to keep in the freezer for grandson visits. My granny ALWAYS kept a stash in her freezer when we were growing up. I plan to uphold the tradition!

I have a couple of CASA visits to do next week (along with Daddy's doctor's appointment), then the rest of my time will be spent getting things ready for the meeting, which starts Friday night. I need to get the house cleaned, groceries bought and my food prepped and ready to cook.

Dennis hunted 2 or 3 days this past week and ended up bagging a nice fat young buck. I'm hoping we can wait until AFTER the meeting before we butcher it, but I doubt that happens. Dennis is planning a trip to East Texas as soon as our meeting is over, so he'll probably want to have that chore out of the way early. I'm thankful for the freezer that we bought from Daddy, because for the first time in our 40 years of marriage, I DIDN'T have to defrost the freezer before hunting season!

Another first for our 40 years of marriage, we won't be able to spend our anniversary together this year. Since I'll be in Vietnam from the 6th through the 23rd of November, and our anniversary is the 19th, we will have to celebrate either very early or a bit late. (We did have our Grand Canyon trip though!) We are also having to cancel our annual Thanksgiving celebration. We are supposed to return home on Thanksgiving Day, and the first few weeks will be spent helping Nam adjust to his new home...not a good time for introducing him to the whole family. Hopefully when he gets used to things here, we can get the family together for a quiet celebration.

Well, that's enough exciting news for this week! I hope to see some of you next weekend!